Linda - October 25, 2022
Bella’s been staying with me the past few days. She’s been doing a lot of cooking and cleaning to ensure that I take time to rest. I’m so lucky she’s been helpful around the home while Lauren speaks with the doctors. So far, the doctors say Brian’s brain is beginning to recover a little and he may wake up within a few days. That’s their hope. If he wakes up, there will be lots of rehab necessary for him to resume daily life. I pray every day for his recovery and that his life will remain fulfilling after this incident.
Lauren’s been struggling a lot this week. She’s having to balance being a daughter to me and a mother to Bella. I can tell she’s torn between caring for us both. Thankfully, Gregory returns from his business trip soon and can take care of some chores. I’m not sure how to support her other than keep Bella with me so that she has the house to herself at night.
Bella and I haven’t spent this much time together since before she left for school. Last night, she told me about her new friends. I’m glad she’s going to school with people from all over the country. It seems to have already changed her in certain ways. I didn’t have the opportunity to go to school. I got married to Brian young, I was 21, and had Lauren a few years later.
I hope Bella takes her time to explore her interests and meet different people. I’m worried that Brian’s illness is making it hard for her to go back to school. I tried to reassure her last night that grandpa would want her to continue her studies and move forward with her life no matter the outcome.
Lauren - October 25, 2022
I finally got to take a long bath and sleep in my own bed last night. Mom and I spent the past few days speaking with doctors all over the neighboring areas and trying to understand dad’s condition. I am realizing we don’t have much say, and just listen to their ideas. While he seems to be improving day by day, there is still a chance he won’t wake up.
I’ve been spending the past few days trying to mentally prepare for different outcomes. Greg’s been gone on a business trip the past few days. He’ll be back in two days and then I’ll at least be able to get his help.
Bella’s been great at keeping mom company and helping her at home. It makes me really proud to see her be so caring, yet it breaks my heart that she has to do this when she should be at school. The other day, we went on a long, long walk-through a nearby forest preserve. It’s the same preserve where the two of us go cross country skiing whenever there is a heavy snowfall. She finally told me about her experience at school.
While I can tell she’s having fun and meeting new people, she seems a bit overwhelmed being far from home. There are a lot of new changes at once. I went to school nearby where I grew up. Whenever I felt overwhelmed, I could just spend a night or two with my parents and feel better. Bella said it is hard on those days to have nowhere else to go. She said she’s thought about transferring somewhere closer to home, especially if grandpa needs help.
I’m really trying to help her take the time to adjust and cope with the current situation. While I appreciate her desire to help out with grandpa and grandma, I want her to use this time to expand her horizons, not run home at the first sign of trouble.
Bella - October 25, 2022
I’ve been staying with grandma the past few days. Telling her stories about my new friends and adventures in Oregon seems to help keep her mind off grandpa. Although, I feel bad hiding the more challenging sides of my first months from her, I don’t want her to worry about me with everything going on around here.
Thankfully, I can still talk to mom about these things. She wants me to give school a bit more time to feel settled. At one level, I agree but I think being closer to home might make the next few years easier. It’s been hard having to make new friends, adjust to a new environment, and take challenging courses all at once.
Everything with grandpa has me rethinking living far away from family. Obviously, he’s a lot older now, but I can’t help but wonder now seeing what this has done to my family, what would happen to me if I suddenly fell or suffered a brain injury. Would my roommates be there to find me? Would people know to contact my parents? Who would tell the doctors my medical information? None of my new friends know about my allergies or my appendicitis in middle school.
Maybe it sounds stupid, but it worries me that I don’t have people close to me to handle emergencies. And seeing grandma so stressed, makes me want to talk with mom and dad about all of what I am seeing and hearing as it happened so fast.
Admittedly, I judged some of my friends that stayed nearby for school. After grandpa’s accident, I’m starting to understand the comfort of staying close by.
